eyes are the windows to the heart of darkness

I've always gotten comments about my eyes (how big, how green!), but lately I've been getting a LOT more. Like, every time I leave the house. Several times a day, from strangers. The bank teller said to me yesterday "No disrespect, ma'am, but you have beautiful eyes." (Photo at right by Gary Winter).

I finally figured out it's that my hair has gotten really long, so I've been wearing it back a lot, thus making my eyes more noticable.

So, the other day, a man at the place where I buy my Cuban sandwiches said to me:

"Are your eyes real?"

Now, eyes are not like, say, breasts, where five grand and a trip to the plastic surgeon can augment your natural assets. Are my eyes real? What, like I'd have glass eyes?

So I figured he must mean, "Are you wearing colored contacts?"

So I replied "Yes, they're really this color."

And he said "No, they're so BIG!"

Right.