I will spend my return flight making fun of Jessica Simpson in my head, and possibly to my seatmate

Note to passengers with no shame: Everyone else leaves their trashy magazines behind on the plane. If you leave the plane last, you can take them all. I passed up an Allure before I realized this, but then I nabbed an Elle.

Note the city of Los Angeles: just because you put palm trees in front of it doesn't make it anything other than a strip mall.