forgive this blog for linking to the Onion; original content is forthcoming, but this was apropos

The Onion is running an article entitled Guy In Philosophy Class Needs To Shut The Fuck Up. It's set at Dartmouth (where I was a philosophy major). There's even a picture of Thornton Hall, where I took philosophy classes. And, of course, there was always some douchebag just like this. Strangely, Onion writer and fellow Dartmouth alum/philosophy major Sam, whom some of you saw at August's Jenny Vaudeville Show, does not seem to be responsible.