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October 3, 2005

bar bathroom reader poll

Last night I had drinks with an old friend from high school. We were in a bar, sitting at a table near the window, with no other patrons nearby, when he announced that he had to go to the men's room and walked off towards the bathrooms still holding his beer.

When he returned from the men's room, beer still firmly clutched in the same hand, I asked about it, and he said "I only need one hand for this operation!" and that he thought all guys did that.

I said I thought maybe a guy would take his beer into the men's room in a crowded party in which there's nowhere to safely leave the beer, or if he is in a bar alone, without someone to watch his drink. (My friend objected that if I watched his beer for him, he would not be able to continue drinking while in the men's room, which was, as far as I was concerned, well, kind of the point). But if one is drinking at a table with a friend, I daresay most people would leave their drinks in the care of their drinking companions.

Menfolk, please feel free to comment in the comments.

8 Comments:

Blogger Brian Van said...

It's actually a sobriety test: if you can't skillfuly hold a beer in one hand and your braciole in the other, then you've probably had too much to drink.

11:57 AM  
Blogger whythehellisthissohard said...

Sorry, but that’s disgusting! Would you bring a hamburger in there with you? How do you wash your hands?

12:02 PM  
Blogger Brian Van said...

George Carlin says: "If your crotch is so filthy that after touching it you need to wash your hands, you should probably just scrub your crotch."

And since when are people licking my fingers, used glasses, or random surfaces in a bar, anyway? Don't worry, my crotch didn't get in your PBR. You'll know if it did if it tastes better.

1:13 PM  
Blogger Michael said...

If a guy can't part with his beer long enough to go take a leak, he probably needs more trustworthy friends. To everything there is a season--a time to be born, a time to die; a time to drink, a time to piss...you know the drill.

I'll grant you most guys probably don't bother washing their hands anyway, and with a lot of American beers, it's hard to tell the difference between spillage and a misfire. Better to take it in turns, if you ask me.

4:08 PM  
Blogger F-red said...

I use the bathroom break to pace myself.

8:23 PM  
Blogger Shaun Eli said...

Yuk.

If you ever introduce me to him, remind me never to shake his hand.

11:23 PM  
Blogger markclemens said...

Gah... I'd say yes, it's okay to leave the beverage with your drinking companions. If it's a domestic beer, you'll just confuse the urine for it anyway.

Reminds me of Tom Green's stupid beer into urine stunt.

2:01 AM  
Blogger EL A. said...

Gad zooks! Who the f*ck takes a beverage to the urinal with them...especially a beverage that actually "looks like" URINE!

He's probably into watersports... (no judgement!) lol.

10:14 PM  

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