we need to put in a dome!

Stephen Colbert's graduation address at Knox College:

And when you enter the work force, you will find competition from those crossing our all-too-porous borders. Now I know you're all going to say, "Stephen, Stephen, immigrants built America." Yes, but here's the thing -- it's built now. I think it was finished in the mid-70s sometime. At this point it's a touch-up and repair job. But thankfully Congress is acting and soon English will be the official language of America. Because if we surrender the national anthem to Spanish, the next thing you know, they'll be translating the Bible. God wrote it in English for a reason! So it could be taught in our public schools.

So we must build walls. A wall obviously across the entire southern border. That's the answer. That may not be enough -- maybe a moat in front of it, or a fire-pit. Maybe a flaming moat, filled with fire-proof crocodiles. And we should probably wall off the northern border as well. Keep those Canadians with their socialized medicine and their skunky beer out. And because immigrants can swim, we'll probably want to wall off the coasts as well. And while we're at it, we need to put up a dome, in case they have catapults. And we'll punch some holes in it so we can breathe. Breathe free. It's time for illegal immigrants to go -- right after they finish building those walls. Yes, yes, I agree with me.

I think my year at Dartmouth we had the prime minister of Finland, who had attended Dartmouth on some kind of exchange program. A year or two later, they invited J.K. Rowling, and all hell broke loose.

As someone said in the comments (on alternet.org, where Colbert's speech is posted):

Many people don't realize this, but Comedy Central has optioned THE DAILY SHOW internationally~it is carried by CNN international to remote parts of the world we've never heard of. I find this comforting on nights I can't sleep from rage and worry.

My hope is that this will prove to be our greatest export--this scathing satire--letting the rest of the world know that our government is NOT representing at LEAST half of us. Perhaps this will remind the international community that we are not as dumb and shallow as we seem, buying us a little grace time to get our personal act together.