on the Hajj to Intercourse, Pennsylvania

I live in a neighborhood in New York that is frequented by some number of Muslim women in headscarves typical of various African and Arab cultures, and, here and there, a few in full-on burquas.


East Harlem, does not, however, have any Amish people.

Today I went to the Reading Terminal Market in Philly, ate bacon and cornmeal mush (fried into a brick!), purchased various chocolate-covered items, and just generally speculated about the lifestyles of the Amish people selling goods there. The plump teenaged Amish girl I ran into in the ladies' room wore clunky orthopedic shoes and an apron that indicated that she worked at the butcher stand, and she looked rightfully aggrieved.


Most interestingly, I saw a Muslim woman in a headscarf and ankle-length outfit buying produce from an Amish vendor. I wondered if they shared a conspiratorial look over the apple butter that said:

"Despite our differences over praying
towards Mecca and the spiritual importance
of hand-churning butter, at least we can agree
that all these other women are WHORES."
I would also like to announce that this photo of Li'l Kim is the first thing that comes up in a Google image search for "burqua."