syllogistic logic for five-year-olds

Funniest thing I've read all day (totally non-funny things I've looked at today include a the Egyptian girl who died after surgery to remove a parasitic twin head, and the horrifying Slate piece, Buried Alive in Your Own Skull): a Babble.com article about a woman who enjoys speaking sardonically to her friends' children.

"What's in there?" my friend's five-year-old once asked, pointing to my plastic cup. (Glass is breakable, their parents will continually remind you, like you don't know that. Like a hurled glass has never punctuated the end of a bad breakup.)

"Red wine juice," I said.

"What's red wine juice?" she asked.

"It's what makes me be nice to you," I said.

"Can I have a sip?"

"No. Your mommy brought you your own juice."

"Can mommy can have a sip?"

"No. Mommy can't," I said. "Mommy has to get up early because she lives for you now."

"What do you live for?" she asked.

I pointed to the cup.

She thought for a moment, then said, "You live to be nice to me?"

Smart kid.

Update: The author of this piece is also the author of Pretty in Penury on Nerve, a piece about social class and Pretty in Pink. Lisa Gabriele is so my new girlfriend.