the bank's new security questions make me feel secure indeed

All of my online banking and credit card accounts have taken to demanding that I select new security questions and answers. Occasionally they'll settle for a "mother's maiden name," but the ubiquity of that question has undoubtedly made it lose some of its encryption power.

Now the bank wants to know the town I grew up in, my high school mascot, my father's middle name, the names of my elementary school, of my first pet, of my best friend.

I like this. It makes me feel special. Like I'm on a first date with the bank, and it's going really well.

"And what's the name of your mother's youngest sibling? Really? That's so interesting!"

And then WaMu and I hold hands across a cafe table. "It's like you've known me forever," I say.

You wouldn't believe the interest rates.