Mideast tour: the trials of an introvert
Conversation I just had with a member of the United States Army:
Army: You are very attractive, but you are so unapproachable.Solider then goes back to flirting with Christina, who is showing him the pictures on her digital camera. When pictures of me come up, he says, incredulously, "Look at her, she laughs! She looks so happy!"
Me: I'm just checking my email and then I'm going to go to bed.
Army: It's like there's a starving man and you take a warm Thanksgiving turkey and put it right out of his reach! At least move the turkey a little closer so he can touch it!
Me: Women are not warm Thanksgiving turkeys. We are people with goals and jobs and interior monologues independent of your interest in our fresh meaty smell.
Army: I think you need to work on the approachability.
posted by JenIsFamous at 9/02/2007 02:51:00 PM
6 Comments:
Jen,
You could have said "maybe I don't want to be approached by EVERY Tom, Dick and what's your name?
Love MOM
Perhpas the army zapped his sense of humour?
What sort of person wants to touch turkey? Sorry but my imagination has now gone of in an entirely unwholesome and rather unsettling direction.
Yeah. I'm not surprised, from all I've heard. My friend the MP (the one in the Green Zone) said she is approached daily by guys looking for a bit o'the touchy-feely. The prevaling wisdom, even among her commanding officers, is that if you're a female in the military, and you have a working vagina, you're going to use it, because women are sluts, and are humping everyone on base.
Not even trying to be funny.
Maybe he (and many other Army) just don't make the military/civilian distinction anymore. You're a female over there -- of course you'll throw your legs open like a fisherman exclaiming "I swear to monkey jeebus it was THIS BIG."
Note to Self: remove "warm Thanksgiving turkey" from list of great pickup lines.
this is why I wouldn't do this....like, I'd get none of that attention whatsoever....just lots of contemptuous stares in regards to not being some holiday feast main course eye candy, peppered with the occasional unwelcomed comment on what an inviting target I would be to the enemy....
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