atheist wedding photo
Hwang Woo Suk has nothing on me! Who needs cloning when I can MAKE NEW JENNIFER DZIURAS?
I totally pronounced them married. (I did not actually pronounce them "man and wife"; I pronounced them "equal partners in marriage." Is there really such a thing as an atheist wedding officiant who is not also a feminist wedding officiant? The overlap is near-complete. Few people want a secular wedding and also want to perpetuate outmoded gender ideals; similarly, there is little market for, say, "nonalcoholic tequila." Or, "genetically modified hemp.")
Between creating a new Jennifer Dziura with mere WORDS, and producing children with gay men I've never met, I have completely obviated the need for traditional reproduction. I AM A MASTER OF ALCHEMY AND ABIOGENESIS!
Related post: Don't be fooled by counterfeits
I totally pronounced them married. (I did not actually pronounce them "man and wife"; I pronounced them "equal partners in marriage." Is there really such a thing as an atheist wedding officiant who is not also a feminist wedding officiant? The overlap is near-complete. Few people want a secular wedding and also want to perpetuate outmoded gender ideals; similarly, there is little market for, say, "nonalcoholic tequila." Or, "genetically modified hemp.")
Between creating a new Jennifer Dziura with mere WORDS, and producing children with gay men I've never met, I have completely obviated the need for traditional reproduction. I AM A MASTER OF ALCHEMY AND ABIOGENESIS!
Related post: Don't be fooled by counterfeits
posted by JenIsFamous at 10/19/2007 03:11:00 PM
5 Comments:
You know, I think I should get some credit here. I seem to remember having some sort of role in the creation of the new Jennifer Dziura.
I wonder why I would strive to create a new Jennifer Dziura when one already existed. I wonder if the first was somehow lacking. Perhaps you were just a prototype.
I also notice that a post titled "Athiest Wedding Photo" culminates in a link to a supposed related post. The name of the related post: "Don't be fooled by counterfeits". That seems a little unfortunate. If this post had been shorter the link would have been dangerously close to the photo and may have appeared like a caption.
I can see it now, the headine reads "Athiest Wedding", our wedding photo captioned with an accusation of conterfeiting of some sort, then begins an article by Pat Robertson about sinning and hell and such.
And no mention of my fantastic feat of carpentry behind us in the picture?
You know, Jesus was a carpenter.
The "don't be fooled by counterfeits" is, in fact, about your new Jennifer Dziura; it's not an unrelated warning about ersatz paper currency.
Your feat of carpentry was truly astounding! You made an arbor! It's curvy!
Jen
Your mom's a counterfeit.
P.S. - My wife is frustrated. You seem to have taken all the good gmail name variations.
I can see this being a fairly common problem in the future.
From now on I will refer to you as Tiffany during all family functions.
I also told one of Jen's brothers that his name is now Tiffany, but that wasn't for any practical reason. That was just for my own amusement.
Psst...I love how you pronounced us "equal partners in marriage." Perfect.
If you could send me a copy of the whole thing, I would love you forever.
Well, I suppose since you're my new sister, I have to anyway, but you get the point. :-P
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