The Great Reformation (a.k.a. The 95 Theses of Pilates)
In response to this post, my brother has asked:
This is what happens when you graduate from the sad little point-your-toes-and-squeeze-your-abs mat class at the gym and go to a real Pilates studio that has invested in equipment.
This is Martin Luther, instigator of the Reformation:
Martin Luther didn't do Pilates.
On the Reformer, you can do this:
Or this:
Or this:
Or this:
Or this:
I'm pretty sure this one is Kim Basinger from 9 1/2 Weeks
All of which make a person feel very girly, just like a special snowflake, but none of which will make you look like this:
...which is accomplished by lifting a lot of heavy things (feel free to ask the model), generally with progressive resistance that can be quantified and tracked.
Not to say that a Pilates workout can't leave you exhausted and sore and sweaty. But Pilates instructors say they focus on the "inner" core muscles you can't even see; sure enough, in a Pilates studio featuring a big poster that said "REAL MEN DO PILATES," I was asked to do some very personal squeezing of some very personal muscles.
Do real men do Pilates? Sure, but I'm not sure even someone as Brave New World as I wants to strengthen her pelvic floor in a coed environment.
"Also, what the fuck is a Pilates Reformer? Am I to believe that Pilates was in some way corrupt and was in need of some improvement or amendment?"This is a Pilates Reformer:
This is what happens when you graduate from the sad little point-your-toes-and-squeeze-your-abs mat class at the gym and go to a real Pilates studio that has invested in equipment.This is Martin Luther, instigator of the Reformation:
Martin Luther didn't do Pilates.On the Reformer, you can do this:
Or this:
Or this:
Or this:
Or this:
I'm pretty sure this one is Kim Basinger from 9 1/2 WeeksAll of which make a person feel very girly, just like a special snowflake, but none of which will make you look like this:
...which is accomplished by lifting a lot of heavy things (feel free to ask the model), generally with progressive resistance that can be quantified and tracked.
Not to say that a Pilates workout can't leave you exhausted and sore and sweaty. But Pilates instructors say they focus on the "inner" core muscles you can't even see; sure enough, in a Pilates studio featuring a big poster that said "REAL MEN DO PILATES," I was asked to do some very personal squeezing of some very personal muscles.
Do real men do Pilates? Sure, but I'm not sure even someone as Brave New World as I wants to strengthen her pelvic floor in a coed environment.
posted by JenIsFamous at 2/29/2008 09:53:00 AM
2 Comments:
It looks very much like the Chuck Norris endorsed Total Gym set to a 0 degree incline; i.e. pansy level.
I bet it costs like 10 times as much though.
It's a workout that only causes changes "on the inside" and helps them to feel special and stuff. That's just adorable.
Jen, you are stomping my pilates buzz! I just started last week and so far I like it. And boy, won't you be eating your words the next time I see you and I look just like that shiny model.
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